“Don’t Let it Slip Away”: When Ending a Dispute Begins the Real Work of Keeping the Peace
Thu, Oct 2nd, 2025 | by Miles Mediation and Arbitration | Article | Social Share
By Joe Murphey
Sometimes when traveling abroad you see something that seems out of place. I was surprised recently to stumble across a James Joyce statue in Trieste, Italy. Why is the definitive chronicler of Irish angst honored with a prominently celebrated in a sleepy little Italian town? Seems odd until you realize Joyce lived there for more than 10 years – the most prolific of his creative years, when he wrote both Dubliners and Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man.
I had this same experience on a recent trip to Belfast when, in the quadrangle of Queen’s University I ran across the bust of U.S. Senator George Mitchell. I had a vague recollection of the Good Friday Agreement that ended the conflict in Northern Ireland, and some notion that Senator Mitchell played a role. As I investigated the history of the agreement, I began to understand both the scope and significance of this accord, and just how fragile was the peace achieved.
A Thin Veneer of Peace Covering a Continuing Conflict
The bust of Senator Mitchell was unveiled in April of 2023 (the 25th anniversary of the Good Friday Agreement). By this time, Mitchell had for several years stepped away from public appearances of any kind. He made an exception to attend the dedication ceremony, and he did so for two reasons he made clear. In concluding his brief remarks, Mitchell said, “We need people who believe — who know — the possible does exist within the impossible.” And he ended with this admonition: “Don’t let it slip away.”
Anyone with even the slightest understanding of the profound conflict that roiled Northern Ireland for generations — and then, with a particularly deadly flourish from the late ‘60s until the Good Friday Agreement was signed April 1998 – understands the accord was truly a rendering of the possible from the impossible. Visit present-day Belfast, which I just had the opportunity to do, and you immediately see the deep social, political and religious divide still smoldering between Loyalists (flying their Union Jacks) and the Republicans (they, the Irish flag). The passions that drove years of violent conflict still very much exist.
Flags, banners, bunting, and murals saturate the city blocks. They change colors, and slogans, from block to block. And yet, my wife and I toured the city with no concern for our safety. You can stroll past storefronts on the infamous “Murder Mile” (memorialized in the Elvis Costello song, “Oliver’s Army”) with only the plaque and markers reminding you of explosions and gunfire that once rocked this now walkable retail space. The peace is real, but the divide is ongoing and palpable.
A Challenge and a Warning to Future Generations: Applying the Lessons of History
So, back to Senator Mitchell, and his final public words about the peace in Northern Ireland. He no doubt knew these would be his final public words. And he left us with two points to ponder.
First, we need people who can see the possible in the impossible. As a mediator, I’m almost daily confronted with the challenge from one side, or all sides, “you’ve got your work cut out for you.” I must confess that can be daunting. But I pledge, in honor of and out of respect to Senator Mitchell, to now look upon such challenges as music to my ears.
I will seek the possible in the impossible. Perhaps that begins with an optimism that defies the available evidence. Too often we don’t reach solutions because we can’t see them in our mind’s eye. Attorneys who are hired to resolve client disputes, and mediators who are hired to facilitate that process should boldly defy the notion of the impossible. We are dutybound to be candid with our clients, but candor can’t come at the cost of being defeated before we even undertake to succeed. And, as Senator Mitchell has the advantage of an outsider in seeing solutions to the problem of Northern Ireland, we as professionals representing clients mired in disputes have a vantage point that can offer us a view our clients just cannot see from their subjective and imbedded perspectives.
Mitchell’s second and final message was a warning: “Don’t let it slip away.” I’m convinced we can apply this lesson to our daily lives as well. It’s true that in many negotiated settlements, the signed agreement will be the end of the dispute. Parties go their separate ways, and the matter that divided them becomes a thing of the past.
However, there are many disputes where an agreement is no protection from future conflict. Domestic mediations often have this feature, particularly when co-parenting is involved. Construction mediations also often involve parties who may continue to work together on current and future projects. Disputes over trespass, where the threat of a future flood, release of chemicals or other “repeat offense” looms between the parties to a settlement can also render a present peace fragile.
These are the kinds of fragile peace agreements that Mitchell warns not to let slip away. Here, perhaps the practical lesson is to take care when drafting agreements to anticipate future problems. When you examine the body of the Good Friday Agreement itself, you see throughout a document that candidly acknowledges it leaves unsettled many conflicts that will have to be managed in the future. That the peace has been maintained nearly 30 years now is a testament to both the strength of the language used, and the flexibility of agreement as it has had to be interpreted and implemented across the decades.
When we as professionals are drafting agreements, a nod to the frank reality of potential for future conflict, and a means for managing that in anticipation through drafting, is a must. We must strive to create agreements that will, as best we can, ensure we “don’t let it slip away”.
Conclusion
Like many objects of great value, peace is often elusive, frequently expensive, and sometimes very fragile. As lawyers and mediators who are retained to guide our clients from dispute to resolution, it is incumbent upon us to help parties both find an equitable peace, and then to hold onto it.
*Originally published in the Daily Report and reprinted with permission.
About Joe Murphey
Since 2005, Joe Murphey is a mediator and attorney who has mediated more than 3,000 cases at Miles Mediation & Arbitration, with a success rate of over 80 percent. He is a founding member of the National Academy of Distinguished Neutrals and has been included in Georgia Super Lawyers every year since 2007. When he’s not mediating, volunteering in the community, or spending time with his family, Joe is usually playing his drums and/or harmonicas with several local bands.