Starting out as a Mediator: Six Strategies to Help you Build a Thriving Practice

Thu, May 29th, 2025 | by Miles Mediation and Arbitration | Article | Social Share

I got talked into being a mediator by lawyer friends. They said things like, “man, you have what it takes to be a good mediator” and “have you ever thought about adding mediation to your repertoire?” Internally, I heard them saying, “you’d be awesome at eating Chex Mix in a hallway all day,” and “you should add mediation to your law practice because you’re an awful trial lawyer.”

But they were on to something I did not (yet) know about myself. After a couple years mediating — and building a thriving practice in a relatively short time — here are some aspects I believe are key to building a successful mediation practice.

Be Your Own Billboard

When starting out, you must make “the ask” to every lawyer friend in your hemisphere. Real friends, social media “friends,” friends of those friends, friends who are not friends, etc. Slide into their inboxes with a humble beg to give you a shot as mediator.

Building any kind of law practice is all about marketing. Marketing gets your foot in the door. Superb performance (and the occasional face plant) keeps the door open. Go ahead. Ask people directly for their business and don’t be afraid to fail occasionally.

Find Your Style as a Mediator

Once you get your foot in the door, show up and show out. You must prove your worth as mediator. There are a lot of different mediators out there with a lot of mediation styles. Mine is LOUD. Did I copy someone else’s mediation style? Nope. I am my own brand of mediator. Did you catch the word? Brand.

Differentiate yourself from all the others. Most mediators (at least the male ones) dress the same. Dress pants, sports coat, and those dress sneakers that somehow became cool. Do something different. People see formality on TV in legal dramas. Wear your best suit and shine your shoes. Let the parties to the mediation think, “this guy has that really knowledgeable person look.” You must make yourself stand out in a sea of sameness.

Be a Mediator of All Things Capable of Being Mediated

Another key to building a mediation practice is to not define yourself as a mediator of only certain types of disputes. Most of my career has been in the personal injury litigation space. I have seen just about every angle of a car wreck matter in my career. It would have been super easy to pigeonhole myself into being a car wreck mediator. Not so fast.

When I embarked on my journey as a mediator, I realized I am well-suited to mediate a lot of different kinds of disputes. I spent some of my career representing title insurance companies. I’ve read banking contracts and lease agreements until my eyes bled. I’ve even represented people in domestic relations (God bless them and me). Be willing to mediate any dispute — at least at first. Your willingness to do so helps your business grow. (And you can always specialize later, after you’ve built your practice up.)

Become an EXPERT Listener

Ever been to an auto supply store? If not, it goes something like this. You walk up to a tall counter; describe to a person behind that counter what you need; and that person heads into the back to retrieve your car part. After a few minutes, the person appears through hanging plastic curtains holding the exact muffler muzzle needed for your 1978 Chevrolet El Camino. You stand in awe at the achievement.

How did that person find the exact part based off the following question: “Do you have one of those things that is dark gray that looks like a slim donut that goes on that thing that smoke blows out the back of your car through?” Here’s the secret: he or she listened to every word that came from your mouth.

Being a sought-after mediator requires expert listening skills. In today’s world, attention to detail and listening are lost art forms. I admit that I often flunk the test on both when not mediating. Yet, when I enter “mediation mode,” my ears, eyes, and Spidey-senses are in full gear. I listen and pay attention not only to what’s being said, but what’s not being said, and how the person is saying (or not saying) it.

Impasse? What Impasse?

I have yet to see a conflict I can’t help to resolve. There are a lot of mediations that end without agreement. I don’t view an impasse as an impenetrable wall. I take the approach that I must keep drilling to hopefully get to resolution.

Don’t just give up on the parties or their attorneys. Keep working. Follow up and then follow up some more. By far, the most positive feedback I receive is my tenacity to keep the talks going no matter how long. Make yourself available until the job is done (oftentimes, free of charge).

I’m an Open Book

I hope these ideas give you a starting point on how to build your mediation practice. As with building any business, many times you must take the approach of “Ready. Shoot. Aim.” The beauty of taking the blind shot is it may just take you somewhere even better than you envisioned. Feel free to reach out to me at cparian@milesadr.com anytime with any questions or insights.

*Originally published in the Daily Report and reprinted with permission.

About Cade Parian

Cade Parian joined the Miles Mediation & Arbitration panel in February 2022 after serving for a year on the ADR OnDemand panel. He quickly established himself as a go-to neutral in the Southeast. Cade reached the “Senior Neutral” level within Miles Mediation & Arbitration in his first full year. His reputation amongst attorneys and judges throughout Georgia and Alabama for being a straight shooter helped his mediation practice take off. Although he has spent the past 8 years representing Plaintiffs in personal injury matters, he brings a wide range of experiences and perspectives to helping parties resolve their disputes no matter the subject matter.